My new poem comment if yer interested!?

  • The thing I wish I knew of you

    everytime the closet opens
    as my arms extend that length of space
    (end to end
    they are the length of me)
    that fact is in my brain
    put in by someone's mouth
    an open book?

    a dusty novel
    laying on the floor
    next to clothes worn-
    out in sun
    under the moons of your eyes

    behind the sliding doors
    where i find
    the question i claim
    screaming out
    your full name
    empty
    in the middle
    it's core

    i wish i knew your middle name.


  • uhhmmm..its pretty good..not brilliant but just okay. I suggest you put more rhyme to it to make it sound better but its good you put some mystery element to it..


  • I love it! Great work.
    I would LOVE your opinion on mine:
    http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?...


  • you can do better


  • i feel like its just a first draft







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    8 January 2009 | cameltoepants.com | edit